London Photo Diary: Numero Uno

I should probably make more an intro for this but I think it mostly speaks for itself. I have a thing for interesting words and images (obviously!) so I've decided to start building myself a little collection, a small sample from the catalogue of life that is London City.

This is an electronic advertisement in Piccadilly Circus from McDonalds. It randomly chooses Rock, Paper and Scissors and people touring London play along with it (after staring at it in confusion for a while).



I really love words so I can't help but appreciate this is clever turn of phrase in the underground.



I went to an underground gym with a LOT of stairs with my housemate Mike. About halfway down there was this cheeky message on the wall.



The best thing ever to happen to a sheep? I'm not so sure...



Cutest, invasion, ever!



I love innocent. They are the most charming brand around at the moment I think. This says 'we love our orange juice because it tastes very, very good. But enough about that, heres a squirrel looking terrified.' How sweet!



I, I can't remember where I buried them

Finding Somewhere

'Would you tell me, please, which way I ought to from here?'

"That depends a great deal on where you want to get to," said the Cat

'I don't care much where-'

'Then it doesn't matter which way you go,' said the Cat

'- so long as I get somewhere,' Alice added as an explanation.

'Oh, you're sure to do that,' said the cat, 'if you can only walk long enough.'

I am once again delving into Wonderland but once again for a valid reason. You see, for all my research and education in marketing, advertising and communications in general I'm still not sure where I'm going. That is why I have kicked up my roots and shot down to London Town. My thinking being a lot easier to judge a landscape if you can see it. Makes sense right?

I have to say it feels good to be here. I'm filled with equal parts excitement and gut wrenching fear (Ok, maybe 40-60) but that's the healthy thing to aim for. I couldn't take sitting on the sidelines of Norfolk, watching everyone try and not give it a go myself. I went out for a few drinks last night to celebrate my new housemate's birthday (and on a sub-level, my arrival) and there was a bit of awkwardness when people asked me what I do:

Well I do advertising... well, not yet... but I want to do some... not like Mike (who does facebook ads etc)... but creative ideas and writing... and stuff... well kind of... so what do you do?

It, is, awful. I suppose the good thing from my point of view is that my overthinking mind already compared having a job I don't like but pays and being unemployed for a while until I get what I want and I stand by it's decision. Still, I have to say it will be made painful by the fact that my current social circle consists of almost exclusively economists and bankers. Still I think it will work in the long run... I think.

So from here on out, it will just be me, my boots and this road without any signposts. As I don't know where I'm going I have the luxury of being unable to take the wrong path - as long as I get somewhere.

Hope

I'm big fan of storytelling, most of all, the way heroes and villains are so frequently portrayed so obviously. The good guy, usually dressed in white defeats the black evil doer and world peace follows.

Right. That's great. Good for them.

Sometimes, however, stories manipulate the truth and bad guys can be portrayed as good. I would like to expose one of these sheeps for the wolf that it is. My target is a little thing most of you have heard of called hope.

Hope is not good. It is not your friend. Hope is a wolf, and it will betray you when it starts to get hungry.

Let's use an example. Lets use Max, the cab driver from the movie 'Collateral'. For those of you of who haven't seen it, Max is a cab driver who dreams of owning his own limo company (there's a part where an assassin by the name of Tom Cruise gets in his back seat but that is irrelevant for this point). He has plans and ideas formulating in his head, talks the talk and walks... oh wait, he doesn't 'walk'.

Do you know why? I'll tell you.

Hope.

He hopes it will happen. He hopes one day his dream will come. With a pinch of irony, the hope we have for something often paralyses us against making it happen. Hope leads to fear that our dreams won't come true, or be as good. Most of the time people would rather hang on to the hope they have for something than actually try because trying means the image they have in their heads will have to be destroyed.

It's such a shame because hope is meaningless. Actions count! I understand the comfort hope can bring but unless you try to achieve what you want hope gathers more value than it deserves and becomes a hinderance.

I'm not saying this to be cruel. I'm saying it to give you the motivation to actually chase your dreams and desires. Hopefully at least (I couldn't resist!)

Heaven on Earth

Heaven and hell suppose two distinct species of men, the good and the bad.
But the greatest part of mankind float betwixt vice and virtue.
David Hume

The new trailer for Devil May Cry 5 is reigniting my love for the series. The mythology and story are so rich that it's easy to delve completely into it's world. One my favourite ideas is the outside-in view of mankind portrayed. To me, it feels like seeing the backstage area of the world.

I think that it's our downfalls and weaknesses are what make us special so, once the veil of romanticism is lifted off of mankind it's true beauty can show through.

Thoughts on 'The Hood'

I recently reread 'Little Red Riding Hood' and I have some thoughts.

Firstly the protagonist, Red Riding Hood. How disappointing she is and certainly not the brightest light bulb in the house if she can't tell the difference between her grandmother and a four-legged, carnivorous canine. Maybe she should be going to school instead of having picnics in the wood?

As for the wolf. Well foremost, he's a WOLF! People always seems surprised or disappointed when he tries to eat people. Why? That what wolves do. Would people be surprised to get stung by a bee or wet from the sea? No! Let's give him some kudos for taking a more sophisticated, strategy all be it not in the most flattering manner.

I do however feel sorry for Grandma, the poor, neglected old lady. I would like to point out though that the wolf getting into her house was the result of negligence on her part, be it, from leaving a window open or answering the door to a wolf so we get an idea of where Little Red gets her wits from.

I want to rectify the Lumberjack myth as well. He's not a hero. He's a murderer of the smartest wolf on record and (depending on which version of Riding Hood you subscribe to) possibly a pedophile.

Here At Reading

Frankly, the lateness of this post is an outrage but I was struck by 'Reading Flu' for the week and a bit after the festival so it got put on the shelf.

This is just some clever ideas I noticed during the festival that I thought were worth sharing.




This is for 'bollocks to poverty' campaign to raise awareness. They were giving out temporary tattoos and had a photobooth, a tent with ping pong and foosball table. I like it that the charity adapted it's approach for the festival and got people interested using fun. I will believe in the power of fun over guilt when it comes to charity.



How trendy are these? They not only look cool but you can attach it to your ipod and play music out of the speakers. I'm a guy so I can't wear it but I still think that's amazingly clever.



This looks good too but that's not why it's here. Have you read it? It's quite possibly the best I have ever heard a bacon bap sound. Seeing this 'the morning after' was irresistable. Unfortunately, afterwards you realize it's still just a bacon bap.



This is just something that caught my eye. I have only seen the atticus bird upside down. I think it's some form of artistic side emerging, noticing how different things can look when you look at them from a new perspective.



Finally, how about a moment of sympathy for the poor chump who had to film from the top of this enormous crane. Poor little guy!

Why Being A Billionaire Would Suck

Travie McCoy wants to be a billionaire (so frickin' bad) and I like to play devil's advocate. What better motivation to write a new post?

This isn't just a passing thought. This has been on my mind for a while. It's one of those random things you discuss that everyone seems to have the same opinion on- Yes I would like to be rich. Why?

My first thought is that we associate more with better, so more money means a better life. Not being a fan of groundless rationalities I would like to present some reasons why being a billionaire would suck.

1. Value
All the way down to our subconscious mind we create values for products based on what they cost. That's why when you eat food from the mini bar it tastes 'better' just because we are paying more. Continuing this line of thought, if you were a billionaire even the most expensive meal would be nothing but pocket change meaning, it would taste like a dog's back on a hot day.

2. Snobs
No-one likes them but the transformation into 'snobdom' is unavoidable like sunlight, the aging process or people putting mayonnaise in your sandwich.

3. Work
The simple truth is no billionaire works 9-5. They are either CEO of multinational corporations, in which case they work all, the, time, or, they're playboys who never really work (they may call themselves socialites). This means either

a) you never see your friends
b) you sit around all day like an old maid, staring to the horizon, waiting for your friends to finish work.

Lame.

4. Trust
Everyone has trust issues. Imagine what would happen if you had a billion reasons for someone to betray you. How would that feel? You wouldn't trust anyone. Boo Hoo. Much worse than your insecurities is the very real possibility that you are not being paranoid at all. You better believe if there was the possibility of gaining a few million dollars commission, assassins will be lining up left, right and centre to unleash their AK47 at your Armani covered ass.

5. No Restrictions
Not completely unrelated to the first point I suppose but from the other side. We love chocolate because we can't have it. Cigarettes are desirable (to some (other) people) because they are wrong. We love things that are stupid and ultimately lead to our demise. BIllionaires have no such area. Want to raft down a waterfall of Mediterranean budgies? Easy. Want a playstation 3 that cooks your breakfast with lasers? It is made. There are no limits and with that comes a world with no desire.

So there you have it. A few select reasonings why you are better the way you are. So please, next time you drool over the thought of super wealth, remember how lucky you are to be a broke loser nobody wants to be.

Imagination Vs Reality

I've been having some extra time on my hands lately so I decided to update my music video repertoire and try to find a music video that was original or witty or in anyway different from the rest of the pack.

I failed.

Everything that I saw looked the same to me, or like something done before. Rapper walking through ghetto with bikini clad ladies; Rock band playing to overenthusiastic crowd; and Neyo, stop stealing from Michael Jackson, PLEASE!



However, my efforts were not completely wasted. I stumbled onto this beauty on Kerrang and it caught my attention for one simple reason. If a movie was made about my life, or me (nudge, nudge, wink, wink, hollywood) then this is how the protagonist, me, would see the world. Half reality, half fantasy and both sides barely distinguishable from each other and forming one abstract visual. I love it when life is interrupted by imagination coming in and crashing the party. It doesn't call and make an appointment, it just shows up uninvited and chaos ensues.

I've always thoughts that's how it should be, with both elements at the same time. Reality is not entertainment. I don't see the purpose of watching something that could happen in real life, or worse, that commonly happens, he said shaking his head at the thought of 'big brother'. On the other hand fantasy works much better on it's own but still not as good as the team like chocolate and caramel. They both taste good alone but together they are a force to be reckoned with. Yum. What was I talking about again?

Inside Me

In search of inspiration I decided to look inside myself, see what I find and well... ta-da!!!



There is something fantastically backwards about drawing words.

What came first?

It's an ancient question, which came first the chicken or the egg?





Let me give you the 411

I like Magner's cider. It's yummy! I also like their ad where people catch things and dive around in a puppet like fashion.

In contrast, I don't like Bulmers cider. It's not a pleasant taste to me. Too sweet. Coincidently I also don't like their ad with summer in their shed or factory or whatever that is.

I'm not a fan of coincidence so... there be 3 explanations by my eye.

1. I like the cider based on whether I like their ads in which case, kneel before advertising lowly peasants. Mwah ha ha ha!

2. I like ads based on the cider (This is more likely as I seem to remember making my decisions about said ciders before I'd seen any advertising about them). Back in your box, advertising!

3. I judge both aforementioned ciders and ads independently of the others based on my own reasonings. This can't be true. Can it?